You can’t tell mom. She’s not here.

But what if you could? What if she was? 

What would you tell? 

Growing up, like most siblings, my sister and I, spent a lot of time arguing back and forth. Often at the end of a verbal debate one of us would yell, “I’m telling mom!”, in which the other would yell back “I don’t care!”. 

Often, those words weren’t true, we cared, but (she) mom was not there, so we had to pretend.

My sister and I no longer argue. Nor do we threaten to tell mom. Arguing is not what we do and our mom is not here. 

But what if she was? What would I tell?

I’m telling mom- I care. No need to pretend.

I’m telling mom how much I love and miss her. I'm telling mom how much I appreciate her. I’m telling mom how much I value every lesson she ever taught me. I’m telling mom how thankful I am that God chose her to be my mother. 

I’m telling mom how grateful I am for everything she’s ever given me. I’m telling mom that all those times I said she didn’t love me, have proven not to be true. I’m telling mom that all those times I called myself not speaking to her, because I was mad at her, were not worth it. 

I’m telling mom that all those times I didn’t want to hug, kiss, or say “I love you”, because of who was watching were all missed opportunities. 

I’d do it now in a heartbeat. 

I don’t care who's watching. 

But I do care what they tell you about your son.

Especially since she’s not here. 

What about you? 

What would you tell your mom?

And if you can, what’s stopping you?

If you enjoyed reading this, you’ll probably enjoy part II and III. From now until Sunday I will be sharing Mother’s Day stories. Ensure you don’t miss any by giving your email here.

IT IS SPRING. AND I AM BLIND.

A few days ago I read an amazing story about giving and. It reminded me of you.

Once upon a time an advertising copywriter saw a blind man in Regent’s Park with a sign that read: “I am blind. Please give”. To help him raise more money, he rewrote the sign to read: “It is spring. And I am blind.” Those passing by now gave thought to what it must be like to not see all the beautiful flowers, the trees turning green, and the birds making their nests. It helped them empathize with a blind person. And once that happened, they gave more money.

This brilliant copywriter could have given him money, and maybe he did, but he also gave him so much more.

And that is what Giving is Like.

If this sounds anything like you, this is for you.

Give Me A Book!

Last week a former coworker reached out and asked for some good books to read. 

Fast forward to 8am this morning- I was on a zoom call recording a conversation for a podcast. 

The podcast host is an amazing woman I met in November of 2020 while we were both students of The Story Skills Workshop by Akimbo. 

During our conversation she asked how I’d heard about Akimbo. 

It was 2016 and I was checking out the book table at Costco when I saw a huge orange book- “Tools of Titans” by Tim Ferriss. 

I was super early in my loving to read phase and decided to crack the book open and give it a glance. 

I loved what I saw and decided to buy the book. 

When I got home and began reading I came across some wisdom from a gentleman by the name of Seth Godin. 

I had no clue who he was, but after doing a quick search, I decided to subscribe to his blog. 

In November of 2020 Seth sent an email inviting readers to join Akimbo’s (the company he founded) Story Skills Workshop. 

I joined, and it changed my life, in more ways than one. 

• I got over the fear of telling my story. 

• I learned how to tell a story. 

• It led to multiple fulfilling opportunities.

I’ve coached in every session of The Story Skills Workshop since (5 sessions), and I’ve also had the opportunity to coach in two other Akimbo workshops, both of which were created and are taught by Seth. 

All from a book. All from a gift to myself.

A gift that keeps on giving. 

Give Me A Book!

PS. If you’re ever looking for book recommendations- feel free to email me. It would bring me nothing but joy to give you a book gift.

Someone Is Behind You

In December of 2020 over 900 cars paid for each other's meals at a Dairy Queen drive-thru. 

According to the general manager the chain stretched over the course of nearly three days.

At the end of each shift she would give an update on the restaurant’s Facebook page.

“..Over 100 cars”

“We are still going strong…over 150 cars..”

“...OVER 275 cars..”

Which reminds me..

There’s something about seeing someone give, that makes you want to give too. 

Don’t let the door close. 

Don’t let the chain break. 

Someone is behind you.

Don’t let the giving stop here.

the key that opens doors

Imagine you’re walking inside of a building and the person in front of you, also walking inside of the building, decides to hold the door open for you. 

Just as you are walking through the open door, you notice someone coming in right behind you.

What do you do?

I’m guessing you’d probably do what was done for you. 

Well, you don’t have to imagine, this happens all the time. 

You’ve probably held your fair share of open doors. 

Well, since the door is open, what else has been done for you?

Imagine what might happen if you held the door for someone else.

Well, you don’t have to imagine, you could do it and see for yourself. 

Do unto others what has already been done unto you.

Keep the doors open.

The One Thing

Two days ago a question was raised in one of the slack channels I am apart of. 

And of course it got me thinking. 

“Have you accomplished the one thing you’d want to be remembered for when you die?

Well, have you?

Could you?

When will you?

Because, um, what’s stopping you?

“The One Thing” also happens to be the name of an incredible book by Gary Keller, one in which, (go figure), I’ve read twice.

Throughout the book one can find one clarifying question:

“What’s the One Thing I can do, such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”

Hmm..

What’s the One Thing you can give, such that by giving it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?

And in closing, a word from the great Apostle Paul: 

“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But One Thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead..”

PS- What is the One email you use to check all the important stuff?

How Does Love Work?

John 3:16 is one of the most popular scriptures in the bible. 

You’ve probably heard it before. 

For God so loved the world that He gave..

What’s your name?

Who or what are you so loving?

What’s your proof?

Mandell so loved you that he gave..

Try it, it works with your name too..

That’s your proof. 

Oh, and who knew, the giver and the receiver just might be you. 

That’s how love works. 

If you enjoyed this love note and would like to continue loving, you can do so here.

When Your scared sneaks in

Saturday morning, for the first time, I visited Stone Mountain Park in Stone Mountain Georgia.

Years ago my cousin would frequently post his workouts up Stone Mountain, and since then, I’ve been interested in walking up for some exercise. 

And after seeing the beautiful views at the top of the mountain, especially during sunrises and sunsets, I just knew it would be more than just exercise. 

And so finally I went.

Alone. 

Scared was the furthest thing from my mind..

I’d been walking up the mountain for a good while now.

Up and Up. 

Higher and Higher. 

Steeper and Steeper.

Heading ever so carefully towards the height of the mountain. 

1,683 feet above ground. 

And then..

My scared snuck in. 

I had gotten to the steepest part of the mountain.

Guardrails had been installed for holding on. 

It felt as if resistance was pulling me backwards.

And backwards I would have gone.

1,000 feet backwards.

Had I not been leaning forward.

I’m going up this mountain, no longer all alone.

I have my scared with me now. It snuck in. 

I’m beginning to wonder what would happen if I slipped and fell? 

Would I be able to catch myself?

How far would I actually fall before I stopped?

Has anyone died climbing this thing?

Why would they offer something like this to the public, unmonitored?

The ground is wet.

Maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all. 

I stopped myself while on the mountain. 

I stopped to acknowledge my scared. 

I stopped to remember all the times my scared snuck in, and how I overcame. 

I stopped to breathe, to relax, to gather myself, and remind myself of what’s possible. 

To remind myself what’s on the other side of my scared. 

And then someone said “I promise, this is it, after this, it’s the top”

At that moment I realized how close I was. 

What’s your mountain?

At what point did your scared sneak in?

Do you realize how close you are?

I reached the top of the mountain.

And by the looks of it, you would’ve thought my scared snuck out.

It didn’t. 

I just decided what to do with it. 

After all, it is my scared.

MixCouraged

Sometimes you might have courage. 

Sometimes you might not. 

Sometimes you might have courage in one area, while in another area you might not. 

MixCouraged 

You’re not fully discouraged. 

You’re not fully encouraged. 

You’re MixCouraged

You’re carrying encouragement and discouragement at the same time. 

You’re pouring courage in, yet discouragement pours in too.

MixCouraged

There’s a way to drown discouragement out.

There’s a way to override the mix, to favor courage. 

Keep pouring courage in. 

In Courage Yo’self.

How much can You Give away?

Like many children I had dreams of one day getting rich and buying my mother a car. 

I also had dreams of one day buying both my grandma and great grandma new homes. 

Unfortunately, all three passed away before I was able to see those dreams come true. 

I learned how to tithe from my mother. (Giving 10% of your earnings back to God)

A principle lived and preached by my mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother until their dying day.

A generational gift. 

As I got older I dreamed a new dream.

I dreamed of one day tithing 90% instead of 10. (and still being ok) 

Growing up my Dad would say- “It’s not how much you make, it’s how much you keep.” and I remember making both my dream. 

Making + Keeping. 

As I got older I dreamed a new dream. 

“How much can You Give away”

This is my current dream. 

I dream it often. 

How much can I give away? (and still be ok)

It is not lost on me that today is Easter Sunday, and what this holiday weekend means and symbolizes for so many. 

How much can You Give away?

Happy Easter to you and yours. 

P.S. When’s the last time you dreamed a new dream? 

Can you be trusted?

I have a secret. 

You ready?

Ok, here it is..

I don’t want to be a writer. 

I never did. 

I want to communicate well. 

Writing is one way. 

I want to give well. 

Writing is one way. 

I want to help people become better givers. 

Writing is one way. 

One way I have chosen to do the thing that I really want to do. 

Can you be trusted?

With an ability?

Not to get so lost in the ability that you forget the purpose?

Can you be trusted? 

non-dominate gifts

Whenever we are holding space for people it’s important that we give space for non dominant voices. 

What if we saw non dominant voices as a form of non dominant giving?

There are voices that often go unheard because they aren’t dominant. 

They aren’t- adults, male, white, rich, famous, extroverted, tall, and English is not their first language. 

A lot of gifts often go unnoticed for some of the same reasons. 

They come from people who don’t check the boxes mentioned above. 

There’s a story of a group of rich men giving their large gifts to the temple, and in comes a poor widow woman giving her two cents. Somehow she gave more. 

You don’t need the dominant voice and you don’t need the dominant gift. 

You have something to give and it just might be more.

A smorgasbord of giving.

No time for yourself is abuse to yourself. 

Giving for love vs Giving from love. 

Giving is not a feeling. 

Giving is a commitment. 

The more I write the harder it becomes not to write. 

The more I give to myself the harder it becomes not to give to myself. 

Giving is something I get to do. 

Whose the one person I could give to that would make giving to everyone else easier?

You cannot pour from an empty cup.

I know I know I know

Ugh, it makes me cringe. 

It grinds my gears. 

I know I know I know 

It shouldn’t get me upset.

Maybe because..

I know I know I know

What it’s like, to miss out

On a learning opportunity 

continuously saying.. 

I know I know I know 

Maybe because I want so bad for them to get it 

I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know 

That’s what I often find myself saying. 

I know I know I know 

We sometimes take it personal 

I know I know I know 

It can be hard to separate what we know from who we are. 

I know I know I know 

The ego makes it much easier for us 

to defend what we think we know. 

I know I know I know 

Is one of the best ways to lose the gift we could have. 

The gift of better. 

Since I know I know I know 

I have it. 

I know it. 

I leave it. 

I know I know I know 

Is that what we want for ourselves? 

But then again, I don’t know.

You too?

I’m a giver. 

You too?

I give often to others. 

You too?

Most times my giving is appreciated. 

You too?

Sometimes it’s not. 

You too?

But I don’t give to be appreciated.

You too?

One last question, everything that you do for others, would you do for 

You too?

Ok..

Maybe..

Two,

If no one else appreciated you, could you appreciate 

You too?

Me too.

A moment Pt.2

Today I learned more details of a young teenage girl who was stabbed multiple times and later died. It happened in my neighboring town and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. 

I needed a moment. 

Or two. 

This evening I spent a few moments watching the news and seeing all the terror happening in the Ukraine. The innocent humans killed and their dead bodies just laying throughout the city. 

I needed a moment. 

Or two. 

A few hours later I learned more details of my friend's death, and once again

I needed a moment. 

Or two. 

In those moments I also learned writing those words helped someone and was appreciated. 

Moments were taken.

And moments were given, to tell others they are loved and appreciated. 

Lastly..

A few moments ago as I was putting this tithe together, I spent some time reading the infamous story of Jesus feeding the 5,000. 

While reading the story, my eyes scrolled up to read the stories previous moments. 

And I saw something I never saw. 

The place Jesus was when he fed the 5,000 was a remote and solitary place. 

A place Jesus traveled privately after hearing of his cousins murder. 

Even Jesus needed

A moment. 

Or two. 

One of the Greatest Gifts

Don’t make assumptions. 

That’s it? 

That’s the gift? 

A few years back I opened a book and found a 3 word gift laying there waiting for me to open and receive.

It drastically changed my life. 

Don’t make assumptions. 

So freeing. 

And each time I remember, it’s like opening a new gift for the very first time. 

I can let go

of what I don’t know.

my assumptions. 

I can stop making up stories in my head. 

I can ask.

I can wait. 

I can..

not make assumptions. 

A few weeks ago as I was walking around at work, I noticed from the corner of my eye, a book-

“The Four Agreements” 

I looked at the young lady whose desk it was sitting on and said, “The Four Agreements, now that's a great book”. In absolute excitement she responded “Really? I’ve heard so much about it, I’ve just started.”

..

A few days ago, I saw the same young lady, again with a book. In my excitement I beelined in her direction and asked “What are you reading?”

“Oh, it's the same book, The Four Agreements”

In my head I started thinking about how short the book was, and wondered why she hadn't finished yet, but before I uttered my assumption..

“ I just love chapter 3 so much, I keep reading it over and over.”

Not wanting to assume I asked, “Which agreement is Chapter 3?

“Don’t make assumptions.”

My response: “That’s why I asked.”

We both laughed.

That’s it?

That’s the gift?

Don’t make assumptions.

Lighting The Way

Yesterday evening, while driving on a dark highway, in the pouring rain, I saw something I’d never seen. 

I have been driving for 17 years, more than half my life, yet I’ve never seen this.

I’ve taken many road trips south, in the middle of storms, on highways with no other cars in sight, and no street lights, still I’ve never seen this. 

Until last night. 

The darker the road, the better it is to have someone else with you. 

Lighting The Way. 

When it’s raining and you can hardly see, it’s better to have someone with you. 

Lighting The Way. 

Behind you, in front of you, or on the side.

Sometimes the weather is so bad, you don’t care, as long as they’re near. 

Sometimes the weather is so bad, you just don’t want to be alone. 

What if you were the car, close enough

Lighting The Way.

P.S. Was there a Daily Tithe that helped light the way for you this week? If so, it might be possible to give light by sharing with someone, it’ll only take a moment.

A moment

Monday morning at 10:49 I received a shocking text message.

I needed a moment. 

After reading the text, in absolute disbelief, I leaned over my towel cabinet and placed my head in my arms. 

I needed a moment. 

Someone whom I have gotten to know over the last year, had suddenly passed away. 

I need a moment.

Two weeks prior to her death we were on a zoom call together celebrating 1 year since we graduated from the altMBA, a workshop in which we spent many moments together. 

Moments being vulnerable. 

Moments getting over our fears. 

Moments full of emotions. 

Seeing each other, empathizing with each other, being there for each other, and showing love to each other. 

We did it together. 

I need a moment.

To gather..

All my emotions. 

All my thoughts. 

During our last moments together,

We celebrated moments that were, as we anticipated moments to come. 

And then in a moment, 

She was gone.

Yet, the moments remain. 

Yet, the moments live on. 

I’ll cherish those moments. 

I’ll work towards new moments. 

And every time I look at the altMBA coin, I’ll remember the moments we shared.

Together. 

Rest in your moment my friend. 

This moment is for you.  

More Spirit than you think

On February 7th, it was announced that Spirit and Frontier, the two largest ultra low cost airlines (in the US) agreed to merge. 

You may or may not be familiar with Spirit airlines, (in case you aren’t), asking someone you know about their experiences, or reading some reviews online, might be all the humor you need for the today. 

Without stealing all the fun, I’ll say this: 

Spirit airlines is as basic of an airline as you will find. There are no TVs on the back of their smaller than normal un-cushioned seats, and they charge you for everything. Everything. 

For a movie reference many have referenced Spirit planes to Soul Plane. 

Still, with all that’s said about Spirit and all the negative emotions that come up for some, they are still in business. They are still for someone. 

Someone who sees something more. Someone who sees value and opportunity. Worthiness and partnership. 

Fast forward to today. 

It was announced Jetblue made an all cash offer to acquire Spirit. 

$3.6 billion. 

The same airline many have vowed never to fly again. 

Jetblue has said, I see what Frontier sees, in fact with their deal reportedly worth more, they may be seeing more. 

More Spirit than you think. 

You.

Me.

You are not for everyone. Everyone will not like you. Some of your reviews are bad. 

Still you remain in business. 

Still you have worth, you have value. Someone else sees you and thinks something more. They see partnership. They see better. They want to work with you. They want to be with you. They have already chosen you, they are hoping you choose them. 

You are the spirit of what a gift is. 

You are the spirit of what Giving is

Like.

Imagine a bidding war for you. 

More Spirit than you think.