Promise me you’ll write to me

I should’ve been upstairs writing. 

Instead I was sitting on the couch looking for something to watch on tv.

Nothing piqued my interest, but the resistance to getting over my fears was way too strong.

I decided to turn on Netflix and watch “42”.

I’ve been trying to watch this movie for some time now, plus it’s educational, a black movie - about Jackie Robinson. 

That’s what I told myself. 

I needed an excuse for the fear.

Fast forward to the middle of the movie. Jackie Robinson is getting ready to leave his family for a road trip. His wife looked at him and said: “Promise me you’ll write to me”. 

I knew it was for me. 

Mandell, promise me you’ll write to me.

I sat and pondered.

Mandell, promise me you’ll give to me?

What are you afraid of?

What are you running away from?

Where is the resistance? 

Promise me you’ll give to you.

Promise me.